Why are we doing this anyway?

    I am going to assume most of my readers are not totally oblivious to today’s date and the fact it is generally recognized as Valentine’s Day. For the rest of you, you are either single, or you will be shortly, unless you get your butt in gear and go buy some chocolates and the pitiful remains of whatever passes for flowers after all other desperate shoppers got there before you.

    So, why are we doing this? What compels us to spend our hard earned money in a vain attempt to prove to our significant other that we love them by buying them overpriced flowers that will turn into brown muck before the end of the week? We do it because it is tradition, it is expected of us and if we don’t, we find ourselves sleeping on the couch. 

    Who do we blame for this tradition?

    Some say Valentine’s Day is named after Valentine of Rome and Valentine of Terni. Although it is possible they were actually the same person. Either way, they are both dead. And death is not very romantic so that can’t have anything to do with it.

    Another possibility is fertility festivals celebrated in ancient times around mid-February. To begin such a festival, a priest would gather all the villagers and sacrifice a goat. The boys of the village would then take strips of goat hide and slap the girls they liked. I am not sure about you, but I would not want to date any woman whose idea of romance is being slapped with bloody goat hide.

    Then there is the English poet Geoffrey Chaucer. Apparently back in 1382 he wrote these lines:
    For this was on seynt Volantynys day 
    Whan euery bryd comyth there to chese his make.
If I attempt to translate that to modern English, it seems to have something to do with birds making cheese on Valentine’s Day. We move on.

    In the early 1800’s a bookstore owned by the Howland family in Worcester, Massachusetts started making and selling embossed paper lace Valentine’s Day cards. In the middle of the 20th century people started exchanging gifts, candy and flowers as well. And in the 1980’s the diamond industry pushed jewelry as a way of saying “I Love You”.

    And there we have it people. Stores selling cards, flowers, candy and jewelry are to blame for Valentine’s Day. It’s all about getting their greedy little fingers on the money.

    I’d suggest boycotting them, but I don’t want to sleep on the couch tonight.

    So, I wish a Happy Valentine’s Day to my readers. I love you all.